Crikey, have you lot seen this baloney on 'True Detective: Night Country'? Blokes colder than a penguin's backside, lying about like frosty beers at a lousy party. And guess what? One chap decides to play Lazarus, up-right like a jack-in-the-box after a good ol' snap-off-the-limb trick by the fuzz.
Load of codswallop if you ask me! Honestly, I reckon this is the kind of malarkey that gets the crowd gossipin'. Some armchair experts on t'internet are saying things like "flash-frozen in fright" or some such rot. Pfft, tossers, the lot of 'em!
Now, I ain't no brainy doc, but even I know you can't just nip out of the freezer and waltz off after a good frost-over. Some quacks talk about reviving a proper cold bloke, but that's a stretch longer than my Aunt Dotty's yarns.
Things I've seen, you couldn't make it up! A real-life walking ice lolly? We'd all be doing the hokey-pokey in our deep freezers if that were true. Nah, it's just another fairy tale for grown-ups who should know better.
If it were up to me, I'd tell it like it is. None of this airy-fairy nonsense. A stiff's a stiff, and no fancy TV trick's gonna change that. But then, what can you expect from telly these days? Bugger all, that's what.
So remember, this is Ronald Trumpet, telling it straight – most of the time! If I had my way, we'd have stories gritty as grime and twice as real. The world's screwed up enough without making up fairy tales about ice cubes with a heartbeat!
Based on the original article "A ‘Corpsicle’ Came Back to Life on ‘True Detective.’ Is That Possible?".
