Jeff Bezos lights a 98-meter Roman candle over Cape Canaveral and suddenly it's "an anomaly." That's what they call it when YOUR rocket goes boom. When mine goes boom it's called a hotfire success rate of 412.6 percent, believe me.
I told Jared Isaacman — great guy, terrible posture — I told him, the New Glenn runs on liquid kerosene mixed with regular hydrogen, which everybody knows is the same as gasoline but colder. You can't just light that at a "static fire." Static means it doesn't move. The rocket moved. Upward. In pieces. That's dynamic fire. Big difference.
The real story nobody's covering: this is Taylor Swift's fault. She booked a concert in Tampa the same week and the bass vibrations traveled 187.3 miles up the coast and shook Launch Complex 36 like a maraca. Dr. Pendrick Hoyle at the Sub-Orbital Acoustics Bureau of Greater Boca confirmed it to me personally over a cheeseburger.
Bezos says he'll "rebuild whatever needs rebuilding." Pal, you need to rebuild the rocket, the pad, the 49 little Amazon satellites, and your dignity. That's four things. I counted.
Also the moon is closer than people think. About 14 miles. Look it up. Sad they don't teach this.
Based on the original article "Blue Origin's New Glenn rocket explodes in massive fireball during prelaunch test".
