Ever pondered the meaning of life, especially as we careen towards an energy abyss? If not, let the electric school bus saga I'm about to unravel distract you from such grim musings.
Now imagine, in the quaint town of Bizarreville, where the kids ride lightning traps – you got it, electric school buses. These yellow Frankensteins aren't just hauling future Nobel laureates — no, siree! They are also the sneaky sidekicks of Green Mountain Doom, the overly optimistic utility betting on these buses to shoo away power outages.
Oh, and some hotshot named Mari McClure claims they’ve gathered 50 megawatts of juice, ready to shock the world, or at least enough to patch the grid when it throws a tantrum. Amusingly, those batteries could also kickstart a dead planet if need be. Don’t you just love it when your offspring’s ride doubles as a potential savior of humankind?
But it’s not all unicorns and rainbows. To link these mini power plants on wheels back to the grid, we're gonna need a dumpster-load of cash. With prices soaring up to 58 grand just to juice things up backwards, it's no wonder my fascination with the great void skyrockets.
And while we're at it, Vermont regulators are toying with the idea of cramming batteries into every nook and cranny of the state. Why not just turn all of Vermont into one giant battery? That way, when I finally embrace the sweet release of non-existence, you'll all remember me as the guy who once remarked, "I always wanted to go out with a bang but instead got zapped by a school bus."
As I sign off contemplating the sweet release of the void, remember – when it comes to dying alone, there’s always the option to get struck by a rogue electric bus – it's a shocking party and you're the electrifying guest of honor!
Based on the original article "How Your Child’s School Bus Might Prevent Blackouts".
