Ever pondered about the meaning of life? Me neither. I often find myself contemplating which bridge would suit my dramatic, inevitable exit. However, discussing the corporate circus proves equally morbid and amusing!
This year, corporate giants with their big, shiny, eco-friendly boots seemed to take a whimsical step backward. Like me contemplating a cold leap into the abyss, they hesitated. Remember when Stickittotheman Inc was all gung-ho about "green everything"? Well, they scrapped it! Perhaps they figured out that like all of us, companies too will bite the dust, so why bother?
Corporate responsibility has become the joke I wish I could tell at parties—if I were invited to any. In a dazzling parade led by no other than the legends themselves—BigBucks Bank and EcoNotHere Corp—the mighty leaders in finance decided that perhaps, saving the planet was too... mainstream?
And let's not forget the depressing spectacle of over 100 laws tossed around like confetti at a doomsday party, all against the basic decency of keeping our air clean enough not to choke our future corpses. Turns out, being "woke" is now synonymous with being "broke" in the corporate booklet of how-to-not by politicians and faux activists who probably think climate change is a new diet trend.
So here I am, typing away the last words perhaps before my rendezvous with the reaper, and it strikes me—what if we are all just playing parts in some grand, absurd theater of the damned? Corporate or not, we’re just dancing to the tunes of time, occasionally tripping over our shoelaces.
Laugh at it or cry, it doesn't matter. We're all booked for a solo finale. Now, if only I could figure out a way to die that shocks my enemies and pleases the critics. Suggestions welcome!
Based on the original article "Patagonia C.E.O.: Corporate Responsibility Still Matters".
