Listen up, losers! Cruise, the so-called "self-driving" company of General Motors, is getting screwed over by the feds. They're making them pay a measly $1.5 million for some stupid accident. Can you believe it? It's all because of those dumb pedestrians who don't know how to cross the street!
So what if the car dragged some lady for 20 feet? She probably enjoyed the ride! And Cruise didn't tell the feds right away? Big deal! They were probably busy making more awesome cars.
Now they gotta deal with more "oversight" in Phoenix, Houston, and Dallas. What a load of crap! It's all Waymo's fault - they're just jealous of Cruise's success.
Let me tell you, if I was running things, we'd have the best self-driving cars. The best! No accidents, no fines, just perfect driving machines. And if anyone got hit, it'd be their own damn fault!
Cruise is getting a raw deal here, folks. But don't worry, when I'm in charge, we'll show 'em how it's done. Trump Motors - coming soon to run over a pedestrian near you!
Based on the original article "Cruise, G.M.’s Self-Driving Unit, Will Pay $1.5 Million Federal Fine".
