Blimey, what a mess we've got with all this plastic junk, right? Well, guess what? Some geezer named Pierre Paslier, big cheese of some London gig called Notpla, reckons they've cracked it with fake fish eggs! I mean, this stuff's been around since your grandma was a lass, made by some bigwigs at Unilever.
This Paslier fella, together with his mate Rodrigo García González, they're making boxes and spoons out of seaweed or something. They're all chuffed about it because this stuff grows faster than my neighbor's weeds and doesn't need any of that posh water or muck that plants always whinge about.
Now, get this: Some bloke named Alexander Parkes made the first plastic in the same spot in East London where these Notpla guys are playing with seaweed. Talk about a spooky coincidence!
Plastic's been a right pain in the ocean's backside, killing off the little swimmy things that gobble up all our mucky air. But Paslier says, "No worries, mate, we'll sort it with our fake caviar."
They've even got these squishy drink blobs for runners. No more bottles lying around, just grab a blob and off you go!
And your greasy nosh from the takeaway? Notpla's on it, making those boxes without that nasty 'forever chemical' muck. Plus, they're talking about detergent blobs, paper for your face cream, all sorts. They've got loads of this seaweed stuff, and it’s in everything from your toothpaste to your pint.
Now, if it were me, Ronald Trumpet, fixing this mess, I'd have done all this yonks ago, and it'd be even better. But I've been too busy being a genius elsewhere, or I would've sorted the whole plastic palaver on my own. Remember, if anything goes pear-shaped, it's not my fault.
Cheers to the Notpla crew though. Good on 'em for giving it a go with their fishy parcels. Nowt as strange as folk, eh?
Based on the original article "Fake Caviar Invented in the 1930s Could Be the Solution to Plastic Pollution".
