Ever start your day pondering, "Why the heck am I here?" Me too, friend, me too. But while we're contending with our mortality, Apple's busy slapping $3,500 price tags on futuristic ski goggles, hoping you'll forget life's ultimate deadline. Introducing the Vision Pro - or as I like to call it, Existential Despair in HD.
Expectations are soaring like my daily flirtations with the abyss. This gizmo packs an ocular extravaganza, eye-tracking wizardry, and jazz hands recognition. Apple's promising a new "spatial computing" wave. You'll get PowerPoint perks galore as digital stickies hover like guardian angels or pesky flies. I'm not so sure.
Yours truly took these bad boys for a spin, and let me tell you, the clarity's a blast - until the crushing weight of existence comes barreling back. Ain't no high-res display fixing that. Others have tried before. Google, Meta, even Snap - they've all wooed us with headwear that ultimately moonlight as pricey paperweights. It's a techno-tragedy.
The crux of the saga? We humans just aren't keen on strapping PCs to our faces. The novelty fizzles, the closets fill, and app developers wander off like my will to live at a family reunion. Oh, and last year, the mixed reality market took a nosedive by 8.3%. Even Apple's Midas touch might struggle to resuscitate this flatline.
In the end, we're all just searching for connection - or a tolerable level of despair. So as we suit up with high-tech goggles fit for a solitary ski down the uncanny valley, let's not forget the upside: someday, when we're taking that final solo dive into the great beyond, at least we won't look silly wearing ski goggles. Wait, maybe we will.
Based on the original article "Why Making Face Computers Cool Isn’t Easy".
