Ever wake up and think, "What's the point of it all?" Well, so do I, frequently. But today, let’s discuss something that actually made me laugh before I contemplated the void again: chimps peeing together. Yes, you read that right.
So, there’s this person, let’s call them Jamie Observant, who apparently had nothing better to do than watch chimps pee. More than 600 hours of golden showers. At Kyoto Jungle Park (not its real name), Jamie and others found that when one chimp starts to pee, others follow. They call it “contagious urination,” which might just be the secret handshake in the chimp world.
Now, think about it. If I had friends (a big if, I know), and we all decided to pee together, would that make us closer? Or just weird? These chimps might be onto something, though. Maybe life is just a series of following others' leads, hoping we don’t pee alone.
This observation tackled over 1,300 pee parties. Yes, a literal pee-rama. The data showed, the closer you are to the action, the more likely you are to join. A bit like life’s many meaningless choices, eh? Follow the crowd, or be left dry and alone.
Sadly, the lowest on the social ladder always seem to be waiting for someone else to start the stream. A metaphor for my life, really. Always waiting for a sign to start... something. Anything.
In conclusion, if peeing together holds the fabric of chimp society together, maybe I should start going to public restrooms more often. But knowing my luck, I'd probably still end up dying alone, hopefully not in a bathroom stall. Wouldn't that be a crappy way to go?
Based on the original article "Do Chimps Who Pee Together Stay Together?".
