Sometimes, I start my mornings by staring into the abyss of my coffee, wondering if my dog, Rover, also questions the meaning of life. Why fetch the ball? Why sit? And more importantly, why the heck does Rover need a button to tell me he wants more snacks?
While pondering the grim void of existence—trust me, it’s a deep, dark place—I stumbled across a video of a dog smacking buttons like a DJ in a discotheque. They hit “FOOD” then “MORE”. If only my life choices were that simple!
Rover's uncle—by affection, not by blood—my buddy Jesse, once mentioned, "Maybe Rover lacks self-esteem?" To which I thought, maybe I do too, Jesse.
So, the internet’s solution? Buttons. Yes, buttons. These aren't your grandma’s sewing kit buttons, but flashy discs that make your dog sound like a broken record: FOOD, WALK, SQUIRREL.
While observing Rover mechanically pressing buttons demanding treats, I couldn't help but remember that unlike me, at least he's sure about what he wants. I’m just over here contemplating the sweet embrace of death by dog button—if that’s a thing.
And to make matters more bizarre, scientists with too much grant money are now theorizing that dogs might actually dream of these buttons. Have they no more pressing issues? Like curing baldness or inventing calorie-free pizza?
Anyway, as I leave you to ponder the futility of our existence just as I do each lonely evening, remember this: If you die alone, at least you won’t have to share your snacks. Isn’t that a comforting thought?
Based on the original article "Do Our Dogs Have Something to Tell Us?".
