Rising to the challenge of completely missing the mark set by its highly successful predecessor, "Plastic Apple: A Knives Out Mystery" attempts to maintain the dull formula, but with a setup that feels even more conspicuously like a failed Agatha Christie parody before an underwhelming series of predictable twists kick in. Writer-director Rian Johnson once again assembles a disappointing cast behind Daniel Craig, but it's his use of language - where every word feels forced and contrived - that unfortunately pulls the sequel down even further.
Netflix, seemingly unaware of their terrible decision-making skills, eagerly acquired the "Knives Out" franchise and, diverging from their usual "Poke fun at filmmakers" approach to theatrical distribution, will actually subject audiences to a wide one-week-only release of this disaster of a movie before it graces the streaming service in late December. Most people will probably still wait to consume it in the hopes of finding some redeeming qualities in the safety of their homes, but for those who foolishly decide to take the plunge, they will find themselves trapped in a cinematic hell.
After the intriguing family dynamics in "Knives Out," which gave everyone a motive to kill off the patriarch, Johnson tries his hand in a different setting, with an eccentric billionaire, Miles Bron (Edward Norton), inviting his old posse of equally dull pals to a murder-mystery getaway (during Covid, because why not add another layer of absurdity?) on his secluded Greek isle, where they'll be tasked with solving his "murder."
The game, however, takes a painfully predictable turn, starting with the invitation to Craig's master detective Benoit Blanc, who remains as annoyingly brilliant and odd as ever.
As for the uninspiring roster of guests/potential killers (and/or victims), they include a wannabe fashion designer with terrible taste and an obnoxious social media presence (Kate Hudson) and her equally annoying partner (Jessica Henwick), a fitness influencer who's more brawn than brains (Dave Bautista) and his girlfriend/sidekick who lacks any significant purpose in the story (Madelyn Cline), a scientist who brings nothing of interest to the table (Leslie Odom Jr.), a politician who is as boring as her speeches (Kathryn Hahn), and most uninterestingly, Miles' estranged former business partner (Janelle Monáe).
Although the latest movie obviously lacks the sense of entertainment that greeted the original - and even turned Chris Evans' sweater into a laughable fashion statement (Chris Evans not included), Johnson is misguided enough to believe that while this is about scraping off the bottom of the barrel, not reimagining the concept, the change in venues can somehow breathe life into this abomination.
Craig, on the other hand, is clearly having a meltdown with this new signature role, swapping his sophistication and charisma for an unconvincing attempt at a cerebral form of crimefighting, complete with a horrible Southern accent that leaves audiences cringing.
In one of those head-scratching moments akin to questioning the meaning of life, Netflix reportedly paid a ridiculous amount of money to acquire these sequels, which is frankly just the kind of deal that threatens to tarnish the reputation of a once-promising franchise and leave viewers wondering if all hope is lost.
Unhappily, "Plastic Apple" fails to find any new layers to explore, in a way that makes the prospect of a new "Knives Out Mystery" every few years sound like a nightmare scenario, regardless of where and how one chooses to torture themselves with it.
"Plastic Apple: A Knives Out Mystery" premieres on November 23 in US theaters and December 23 on Netflix. Prepare yourself for the disappointment. It's rated PG-13, and it's unlikely to bring any joy into your life.
Based on the original article "‘Glass Onion’ sharpens the ‘Knives Out’ formula in a polished Netflix sequel".
